Shagadelica

PM Jib said from Sept 1, motorists who use tolls 80 times or more in one month will enjoy a 20% discount.

Anyone got details how it can benefit people who goes to work everyday?

if you pass through the toll to go to work and you work 6 days a week. That means, you’ll probably use the toll like 48 times a month. Ok, now do the maths. If you want to qualify for the 20% discount, you need to use the toll at least 32 times more a month. So, the one million dollar question… will the 20% of that 80 times enough the cover the extra 32 times, since all you need is 48 times. Confused?

Let’s say you pay RM1 each time. 48 times means you spend RM48. If you wanna qualify for discount, you have to spend RM80 first. 20% of RM80 is RM16. To make up the 32 times, you need to spend RM32 more to qualify for discount. So? Do the maths yourself lah.

[ Hi babi
Hi people
Do you wanna go for a ride?
No way babi
tangkap sama dia... ]

I’m a babi doll, in a babi world
Round up in lockup, everything is screwed up
You hate my blackie wear, but black is what my hair
I won’t bleach it, just because you don’t like it

Come on babi, crash the party (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, drag somebody (ooo ooo)
Come on babi, let’s go babi (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, kick somebody (ooo ooo)

Lift me up, put me down
and then hurl me around
Don’t spray me, don’t gas me
I’ll get drowsy

Make you talk, make you walk,
do whatever I please
no phone call, got C4
hanky panky

Please don’t touch, don’t play play,
you are not above the law
Please don’t touch, don’t play play,
you are not above the law

Come on babi, crush the party (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, drag somebody (ooo ooo)
Come on babi, let’s go babi (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, kick somebody (ooo ooo)

I’m a babi doll, in a babi world
Round up in lockup, everything is screwed up
You hate my blackie wear, but black is what my hair
I won’t bleach it, just because you don’t like it

Come on babi, crush the party (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, drag somebody (ooo ooo)
Come on babi, let’s go babi (ah ah ah yeah)
Come on babi, kick somebody (ooo ooo)

[ Oh, why am I always on the run
Well, babi, we're just getting started
Oh, you make me sick man ]

Fresh from the oven! The hottest piece of politico bread is Monash (Malaysia) lecturer, Wong Chin Huat, being arrested for sedition by an anonymous fler for a anonymous claim. Ya. The Polis jaDi Raja is arresting a citizen without telling what crime he has committed. Very Boleh right?

Well, he was arrested just a day after he asked people to wear black on Thursday. Aiya… he is so insensitive lar! He should ask Y.A Bhg. Datin Paduka Seri Rosmah Mansor what she likes to wear first lar! Obviously the first lady don like black one lor.

PM went to Jalan TAR and Pudaray and he was SURPRISED by the situation there… He was not happy with the traffic congestion and the inefficiency of the public facilities during his ONE-hour inspection (Did he kissed a baby in public?) there. Ya… what a surprise after all.

To solve the traffic problem in the area, the DBKL flers plan to:

1. Build a multi-storey carpark at Jalan TAR –> to encourage more cars to be driven in to the 2-lane in and 2 lane-out Jalan TAR so they could be parked.

2. Resume the long abandoned Plaza Rakyat project –> they better make sure Plaza Rakyat has enough car park because it will not solve the traffic problem there.

Clever right?

How many ministers from a BN government does it take to change a light bulb? Five 

News report says:

Najib slept at 3am on first day as PM
The new prime minister reveals that he did not sleep much on his first day as PM as he was watching Astro Awani’s analysis of his speech until 3am.

Apa??? He better analise what he did to deserve to be PM lar~

20 Jan 2009, TNB posts Q1 loss, braces for bad 2009

TNB made a net profit of RM2.6 billion in 2008, a drop of more than a third from a year earlier.It posted a net loss of RM944 milllion in the first quarter to November 30 2008 owing to weak electricity demand, higher coal prices and a weak ringgit.

TNB’s foreign exchange loss amounted to RM1.4 billion versus RM242.4 million a year earlier as the ringgit weakened against the yen and the greenback.

Then on 17 Feb 2009, TNB boss is CEO of the Year!

The Star newspaper, reported “a” senior UMNO politician was arrested for corruption. The senior politician, who has qualified to contest a supreme council seat, is alleged to have paid several people between RM300 and RM500 each.

Meanwhile, the Selangor MB has been accused of corruption involving 46 cows.

How come the Star never reveal any names even if the mystery man was seen going in and out of the Mana Ada Corruption Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission office but it doesn’t seem to have a second thought to splash the Selangor MB name on the papers?

Malaysia truly boleh!

Kuala Lumpur: As yet unknown terrorists have this morning perpetrated a heinous & terrible biological terror attack on the campus of a world renowed university in Kuala Lumpur.

Reports emerging out of the Malaysian capital indicate that biological attack occured early this morning at a surau in the Islamic studies academy of the University of Malaya.

The bioweapon was detected by a student at 5 am local time whereupon the alarm was raised. A special Police Hazmat team was dispatched to the site soon thereafter.

Eyewitnesses reported that further carnage & chaos was narrowly averted by the Deputy Vice-Chancellor (Academic and International Affairs) Prof Dr Mohd Amin Jalaludin who swiftly arrived at the scene at 7am and advised students to disperse and return to their respective lecture halls.

The Police Hazmat unit removed the bioweapon at 8 am & was last seen heading towards a special biological containtment facility located in the wet market at Section 17, Petaling Jaya.

When contacted later, a spokesperson for the US State Dept confirmed that the CIA would be assisting the Malaysian authorities in their investigations and clean-up operations.

Casualties (spiritual or otherwise) are as yet unknown.  The involvement of Al Queda has not been ruled out.

Brother Shag, reporting for the Satire News Network from Kuala Lumpur.

Tourism Minister Azalina Othman started a facebook page and asked

“Should the government continue The Malaysian New Economic Policy (NEP or DEB for Dasar Ekonomi Baru in Malay ), or shall they not.” (her words, not mine.)

For someone who has graduated with an LL.B Hons from UM, an LLM from LSE and been a partner of Messrs Zaid Ibrahim & Co in Malaysia & Singapore, to have worded a simple sentance so poorly is compelling evidence against the effectiveness of the that NEP’s educational policies.